A Little Off

This has felt like an odd week for me. I’ve been at least a day off everyday. Because I had Monday off, Tuesday felt like Monday, Wednesday felt like Thursday, yesterday felt like Friday, today sort of feels like Friday but I’m working tomorrow too which makes it feel like Thursday again. There’s just something wrong with that!

It’s been tough to find balance in my life lately, too. I’ve recently started seeing someone and though things are going great between us, our schedules don’t line up as neatly as we would like. As I wrote in my last post, I’ve been doing a lot of tasks at work that require little, if any creativity. Over the next 3 weeks I’ll be out of town three different times so it will be tough to find much rest – though the time off to compensate for it will definitely help – and, again, it won’t be on the really creative side of things.

It’s funny how it all works out. As things begin to go well in one area, something else comes along to take some of the wind out of your sails. At the same time, when you’re really feeling the stress of life, something – or someone – enters in to help turn things around.

Tomorrow we will be finishing up interviews for a stewardship video for a local church. This church has gone through a series of changes in its 40 year lifespan, always faithfully risking to move forward, whether it’s something big or only a little at a time. People who were youth and young adults when the church started are now the parents and grandparents of the current youth – the focus of their current stewardship drive. It’s cyclical. Life, in all its incarnations, finds balance. And I’m trying to reach that balance in my own life too.

One of my favorite aspects of Eastern religions is the desire to live in harmony with nature and to walk a line of moderation between any extremes. Whether it’s the Middle Way between self-indulgence and self-denial or trying to leave a place better than you found it. It’s about doing the best you can; it’s about trying to contribute to the greater good without getting in the way or bringing it down around you.

It’s been a little tedious and tiresome in certain areas of my life – though never dull – and I have longed, for so long, to find rest and the fullness of life, to find balance. Out of nowhere, in amazing ways things are starting to change and grow and move closer to that sense of equilibrium for me. The adjustments may keep me a little off for awhile but I can feel things start falling into place. And for that I’m thankful.

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